Communicating with love

September 19, 2014 at 7:26 am Leave a comment

by Jackie Pau, Sun 14 Sep 2014

As I shared previously, I lost my mojo by ignoring my feelings. When I shared with my SD why and how it happened, he encouraged me with this simple statement: to be vulnerable is to be loving.

Father John Powell echoes this when he talks about how love works for those who work at it; and that the greatest gift of love is self-disclosure, when we communicate our vulnerability, how we feel deep inside, to others.

Self disclosure is not about ventilating, using others as garbage dumps, pouring out our woes in an effluvium of diatribe and histrionics. Neither is it about manipulating others to feel as if they are responsible for our wounds. You need to help me in my loneliness, save me from feeling sad.

Rather, when we reveal who we are with courage, consciously choosing to trust others with our feelings, then we are communicating with love. Likewise, we should receive the sharing of others with acceptance, love and understanding.

When true communication takes place, we have created a safe haven for humanity to grow in wholeness and vigorous health, and also a place where the bonds of relationships can strengthen and multiply. As Father JP put it: It only takes a moment (of sharing) to be loved a whole life through.

Father Dwight Longenecker reminds us* our destinies are to be “filled with the fullness of God.”It’s what we call ‘theosis’. As St Irenaeus said, “God became man so that men could become gods.” What God has in store for each of the baptized is therefore “far more than we can ask or imagine.” If you could see yourself as God intended you to be you would fall on your face in awesome wonder.

This takes place as the power of God within us eventually, step by painful step and year by difficult year, we come to ‘comprehend’ or ‘fully understand and embrace’ the breadth and length and height and depth of the love of God. 

The challenge to be fully alive, to communicate who we really are to God, and to others, is clearly not easy. We often fall prey to what Father Dwight terms foolishness.

Foolishness is worldly wisdom. It is thinking that I can do things without God and make myself better on my own. Maybe through a combination of will power, positive thinking, religious exercises and striving very hard to be a nicer person.

That’s foolishness. Even if you do change yourself in that way you will only be changing the outside. Might as well have a face lift, a new hairdo or botox for all the good it will do you. We need inner transformation. We need to be “strengthened by his power through his Spirit in the inner self.”

This takes “enormous courage and unbelievable stamina”, not just for an hour, or a day, but every morning when we wake up and head out the door, for the rest of our lives. And we can only do it if before we head out the door, we take time to be radically transformed by Jesus.

When we seek unity first with Jesus, when we dare to be vulnerable, to be loving, it is then we will find happiness.

Note to self: Stop relying on self. Let Jesus into my chaotic world, and then, let others in. Communicate feelings and, be vulnerable to be loving.



Entry filed under: Inspiring Faith.

Fullness and Foolishness Do Not Take Pleasure in Others’ Mistakes

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